Sundays, Sundays, Sundays...

Sundays are always a time for reflection. Usually you have more time to just sit down and reflect. Today I took a nap at around 7pm, it had to be my first nap in a couple months. I have too much anxiety to go to bed during the day. It was a pretty hard partying weekend, after all it was Halloween and all. I really didn't want to go out on Friday but I had to accompany my roommate Jamie and J-Lye. Saturday we did some day drinking for the state game. state pulled out a pretty amazing win. we haven't beat wisconsin in awhile. it seems that the rest of the year should be pretty chill, time to go into hibernation. I don't have any real big plans, and the bar scene/partying is getting pretty old to me. I don't mind a couple drinks, but I'd rather work, work out, read, run, and take care of business in general. we dropped back an hour which is real nice, get to go to bed later and wake up earlier. does it work like that? I am not ready winter. I thought about it and i'm not ready to turn 26 either. 26, crazy it's almost 30, it's a lot closer to 30 then 20. at some point you look at your where you are and wonder is it what you envisioned. Better? worse? just different? 26, sometimes you feel like you should be more grown up than you are. Married? with kids? more mature? more settled down? I would say in some ways I have far exceeded where I thought I would be at 26. In other ways, not so much. You look back at your life and start thinking of all the important things... I did a lot before 17, but I really think my life started in college. It was the first time of my life I was exposed to people of all cultures, not just the blue collar low-middle income simple starter home culture of Hazel Park. It's the first time I moved out from my dads. It was the start of my growing up process. The four years of college is where many people "find themselves". You become independent, you realize that no one is in charge of you besides you, you pick your major, you pick your passions, you start working on creating your life, you start growing up. After college, you realize there was nothing actually "grown up" about it. You were placed in this socioeconomic young demographic bubble of ten thousands of people going through the same experience as you. There were thousands of adolescents living with you, next to you, all around you, trying to find out who they were. For the most part, they were broke, they loved happy hours, free food, football games, singing and dancing, socializing, greek events, and having fun all in the namesake of getting a degree towards your stated career choice. Then you hit the real world, if you're lucky enough you graduate with a sweetheart to witness your daily ascension in the real world, you graduate with a job offer, you graduate with a degree of your first choice, you graduate ready to take on all that life has to offer. You graduate knowing you have no regrets, that you couldn't have done it any better, you gave it your best shot, you took the college experience and dominated it, you met as many people as you could, gained a couple of best friends, and most importantly you graduated ready and prepared for the next phase of your life. 3 1/2 years later, at 25 years old, I find myself working in the corporate world, at the largest brokerage, which just got bought out by one of the largest banks. I'm a house owner, a car owner, a land owner, and a cat owner. Am I grown up? Am I considered an adult? Who knows? My biggest fear in life is one day looking back and realizing I just settled, I was just going through the emotions, and at the end I was unhappy. As I reflect on my life now, I realize I can do more, I will do more. The time is now.